If You Give A Mom A Coffee

I love the series of "If You Give A...." books.  Whenever I was teaching in a classroom, I always knew these would be a hit with all the children.  I decided I would make a parody of these stories and had a lot of fun creating it.  

IF YOU GIVE A MOM A COFFEE

If you give a mom a coffee,
Chances are, she is going to want some creamer.
When she goes to the fridge to get it, the toddler will see her milk in the fridge and start crying for it.
While she sits her toddler down to drink her milk, the toddler will want some crackers to go with it.
When she goes to the pantry to get the crackers, she'll remember she needs to make something for dinner.
She'll go look online at allrecipes.com  to find something new to make.
Chances are, she'll get bored looking at food and she'll browse Facebook, to see what is going on with everyone.
She'll remember it's her In Law's birthday next week and needs to go buy a card.
She'll bundle up the kids to go to the store and get the card.
While at the store, her kids see a new game that they want to buy with their gift cards they got for Christmas.
Chance are she'll have to deal with tantrums in line because she won't let them get the millions of chocolate candies in front of them.
She calms them down, check outs, and gets back in the car to go home.
Once she gets home the kids will want to play their new game.
If she plays their new game with them, they'll want to play a bajillion times.
Finally she stops letting them win, they lose, and get bored with playing.
She'll put her little one down for a nap.
Chances are, her oldest will take this opportunity to have Mommy time and wants to read a book to her.
While reading the book, one slow word at a time, she'll remember that she has a dinner date with her husband and friends this weekend.
She'll call her favorite babysitter, but she's not available.
So she'll call her back-up sitter and book her for the night.
She'll remember that she needs to clean the house before she has an outsider see the mess.
She'll start by clearing out all the old leftovers in the fridge.
While in the fridge she sees the creamer.
When she sees the creamer, she'll remember how tired she is, and,
Chances are, she'll want a coffee.


If you liked this one, check out another parody I created: If You Give A Crocheter A New Skein of Yarn!

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